


A Cycle of Betrayal

by dripping_dandelions



Category: Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angry Varian (Disney), Angst, Boys In Love, But she likes to pretend she doesn't, Donella Being an Asshole (Disney: Varian and the Seven Kingdoms), Donella totally has feelings, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Feelings, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Varian (Disney), Hurt/Comfort, I cried while i was writing this, Inspired by Varian and the Seven Kingdoms - Kaitlyn Ritter & Anna Lencioni, Lots of Crying, M/M, Older Varian (Disney), Parent Donella (Disney: Varian and the Seven Kingdoms), Sad Varian (Disney), Varian Angst (Disney), Varian Has Issues (Disney), Varian Needs a Hug (Disney), like a lot, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-11
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:21:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25198423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dripping_dandelions/pseuds/dripping_dandelions
Summary: Hugo struggles with new feelings, Varian struggles with regrettably familiar ones, and Donella is left with a letter.
Relationships: Hugo & Varian (Disney: Varian and the Seven Kingdoms), Hugo/Varian (Disney: Varian and the Seven Kingdoms)
Comments: 15
Kudos: 124





	1. The Worth of One's Work

**Author's Note:**

> The first fanfiction I've written in a while hhhhng please tell me how I do, i SeEk VaLiDaTiOn

"Nice work, Hugo." Donella clapped him on the shoulder. Normally this was the best part, the praise, the approval. But the giddy pride didn't seem to fill him as he thought it should have.

He didn't respond, didn't even turn to look at her. He just stared at his feet, trying to will his nausea away, but the pit in his stomach only seemed to sink deeper. It was as if there was a stone weighing him down. He supposed this must be guilt, he didn't normally feel it to this capacity. He could feel it spread from his stomach to his limbs to the palms of his hands. He could feel it in his teeth and his lips and behind his eyes. It _consumed_ him.

His mentor, ever observant, sighed and crossed her arms, looking down at him, _on him_ , "What's with the cold shoulder? You can use your words, there's no need to pout."

 _Pout?_ The word bubbled with rage inside his mind. He wasn't pouting. He was not some silly child who didn't get his way. _He was not pouting_. His fists clenched and shook with fury and he couldn't help but wonder why on earth he was so angry.

What did he have to be angry about? All he did was his job! He did his job and he did it well! But then he paused... Did he do his job well? 

_No_ , he thought, he got attached. That was the one thing he was not supposed to do. But then he thought of Varian and how could he not get attached. He was beautiful and intelligent and kind _and oblivious and naive and much too trusting_. He was everything Hugo learned not to be. It wasn't his fault he also got too attached.

He had told Varian not to trust him. He had explicitly _told him_ and he did anyway. He hadn't forced him to do anything, so why would he feel bad about it? But he could not blame this hurting on the wonderfully innocent alchemist. No matter how much he tried to justify it to himself, it just felt false. It felt like lies and _he knew lies_. 

Maybe, then, he was pouting. He didn't have the right to feel angry. He had dug his own grave and he was going to have to lie in it. That wasn't anyone else's fault, least of all Varian's. He had dug his grave with gentle touches, sweetly whispered words, soft and heavy lips in the dead of night. He had dug his grave with marks of love in the light of the dawn, with kisses peppered over freckles, with promise after promise he knew he wouldn't be allowed to keep. But the promises didn't feel false. They didn't feel like lies and _he knew lies_. 

"Come on, lighten up, kid. How bout' I give you a week off before your next job, huh? You earned it." With that, she left. She left him dreadfully alone with his feelings, feelings he never learned how to deal with, feelings he was taught to do the opposite of deal with. Why couldn't he push these away with all the other ones? 

Did he really want to though? He liked spending time with Varian. He liked waking up with the boy in his arms. He liked his laugh and his smile and his unwavering stubbornness. He liked his curious brain and his endless supply of questions about any subject you could possibly think of. He liked Varian.

But he had liked other people before too and he had barely felt any remorse when leaving or double-crossing them. He had swindled and tricked tons of people, and they weren't all bad people. It was like a blur of faces and names and jobs. That's all they had ever been to him, jobs. So why was Varian any different from that? He was just a job too, right?

 _Wrong_ , his brain whispered. Maybe that's how it started, except he didn't just _like_ Varian anymore, even though he had barely liked him at all in the beginning. He _liked_ pulling off a successful heist, he _liked_ when whatever alchemy he was doing went off without a hitch, he _liked_ when Donella was proud of him. He _loved_ Varian.

That thought startled him at first, but the more he got lost in his thoughts, the more it made sense. Varian was smart and adorable and perfect. Varian could hold a conversation about alchemy with him and he didn't have to dumb anything down. Varian treated him like he was a good person, something he most certainly was not. Varian pushed him to be better. He couldn't say the same for anyone else, not even his parental figure.

And now he had let Varian down, the only one that believed he could be anything more than a petty thief. Now, the person he _loved_ was stuck in a cell in the very basement he was standing above and he couldn't do anything about it. Hell, he was the one who caused it! The thought made him wanna cry. It's not like he could betray Donella, the one who raised him, and free the boy he had just spent months to con.

_Oh._

That's exactly what he could do. He had been betraying people his whole life, it was arguably his best talent. What made his mentor any different? She was the one taught him how so well, after all. If anything she would be proud, right? That was undoubtably a stretch, but when it came down to the person who raised him and the person who loved him, he now knew who he would pick.

With reassurance from these new found discoveries and a strong determination from his newly realized feelings, he set off towards the basement, where he knew he would be. He only hesitated when he reached the top of the stairs and stared down into the dark abyss that awaited him. He descended the creaky staircase as quietly as possible and ended up in a small, dimly lit room with a cell taking up one half. The cold prickled his skin as he grabbed the keys hanging by the stairs.

The head of the boy sitting in the cell snapped up at the small sound of jingling that filled the silent room. His cheeks were red and blotchy and tears were falling from his just as red eyes, but his face held a look of such contempt that Hugo could barely believe that this was Varian. 

"What are you doing here?" He spat. His voice was cold, much colder than Hugo had ever heard from it.

The question caught him off guard and he didn't respond, taking in the sight of a side of Varian he had never seen before, hateful and crying and shuddering with pure rage. 

" _What_ are you _doing_ here?" He repeated, his breathing growing heavy, "Have you come to rub it in? Laugh at me? Well go ahead! Give yourself a pat on the fucking back, 'cause you've done it! You tricked me and you got the goddamn tokens and- and to think I really believed that..."

Varian's face fell before screwing back up again just as quick, "Just leave!"

He was at a loss for words. How could he even begin apologize? "Varian, I-"

"I SAID LEAVE!" He practically screeched and Hugo stood there, silently stunned, for just a moment longer.

"Leave! Please, God, why won't you just leave?! Was it worth it? I hope it was fucking worth it, _Hugo_." He hissed the name as if it was an affront to humanity and then turned away, as if disgusted to look at him.

There was a question Hugo could actually answer for a change. _Was it worth it?_

_No. Not in the slightest._


	2. Neither of Them Looked Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all the second chapter is H E R E! Please enjoy 💕

"I hope it was fucking worth it, _Hugo_." Varian looked away, barely able to force the name from his lips. It only made the tears fall harder. He wasn't stupid, he knew he loved the snake standing before him. Or maybe that was what made him stupid, the fact that it was _loved_ in the present tense. He still loved the man and he hated himself for it. 

He hated Hugo for it too. Love and hate weren't opposites as they were often portrayed. They were just two sides of the same coin and Varian hadn't called heads or tails. He loved and hated him and both of them hurt. It hurt to love him because he hated him and it likewise hurt to hate him because he loved him. It made him sick, emotionally and physically. He felt as if he was gonna puke up his insides.

Hugo had the audacity to look shocked, hurt even. _How dare he?_ Varian let out an angry sob. It had all been an act. The whole time it was an act and he fell for it. He should have known better. He couldn't help but ask himself, was he really in love with Hugo or just the person Hugo had convinced him he was.

He stood up and staggered forward, his whole body stiff from sitting on the hard ground for hours and his head light and dizzy from crying. He forced himself to look into the other's eyes once more, scowling in a way that felt all too familiar on his face.

"Go away!" He yelled childishly, his throat raw and scratchy, "God, I- I can't even stand to look at your face!" Hugo flinched at that, his glazed over eyes finally seeming to come into focus. He couldn't help but feel bad for his harsh words, but it was the truth. His breath stuttered and he clutched the cell bars for support, leaning his forehead against them and closing his eyes. The metal was cool against his skin that seemed to be on fire.

"Please, Varian, just listen to me for a second." He pleaded, creeping closer to the bars that protected them from one another, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I know I made a mistake, but-"

"SHUT UP!" It was like deja-vu, trapped in a jail cell with rage and betrayal curling in the pit his stomach. He thought he was past that time in his life, back when he had a tendency to lash out like a wounded animal and hurt people. Yet here he was, back in the body of that immature fourteen year old who was determined to blame anyone but himself. Well, even after all these years it's still the same body. Maybe he hadn't changed as much as he thought.

But this time it was justified, right? This time the target of his anger deserved it. Then again, that's what he thought about Rapunzel too. Maybe it was _Varian_ who deserved it. He knew he was a terrible person. He knew he was a _villain_. If people kept turning on him, there must be reason, right? Varian was the controlled variable in the situations, the only thing that remained constant in the two completely different scenarios, therefore he must be the problem here.

 _No._ He squeezed the bars tighter. It wasn't his fault. It couldn't be his fault. He refused to believe it. Except last time... well, if he had just listened to his father, he wouldn't have gotten trapped in the first place. He had probably done something to set this off too. But he thought they were in love. Was he wrong?

Admittedly he didn't have much experience with love, but they held hands. They slept in each others' arms. He was held after nightmares (of automatons and obsidian and unflinching amber) and his tears were kissed away. His long rants and rambling about anything and everything were tolerated, if not _enjoyed_ by the other. There were late nights and early mornings, every possible moment spent together. Hours upon hours of comfortable silence or playful teasing. Was that not love?

Hugo was trying to talk to him again, but he wasn't comprehending anything. It was in one ear, out the other. He didn't want to hear whatever terrible truths he was trying to tell him. He wanted to believe at least some of it was real. He had never been more happy in his life than when he was with him, had never felt more accepted or respected. He had treated him like he was smart and valuable, not like a clumsy little boy desperate for approval. _God, of course it was too good to be true_. 

He went rigid when a very familiar hand touched his shoulder, full of a familiar gentleness that only served to fan the flames of his anger more. He jerked back, pushing himself away from the bars and out of Hugo's reach.

"Goggles, please just listen for a second, I-"

"No!" he squeezed his eyes shut and jammed his hands over his ears. "I don't wanna listen! I won't! I- I can't!" He cursed himself for his stupid emotions and his stupid crying. He had always been a crybaby.

"It's like Rapunzel _all over again_! No matter what I do I just can't seem to escape! Why do I have to mess everything up?!" It grew difficult for him to breath and he wrapped his arms around his body, drawing in gasping breaths. He had hurt so many people, he would never forgive himself if he hurt Hugo too, no matter what he had done to him.

His voice was raw and it made Hugo want to cry too. He wasn't sure what the other was talking about, but he did know that if anyone was to blame for this situation, it was Donella and it was himself. Not Varian. Least of all, Varian.

"I didn't- It's not your fault, ok?" Hugo's eyes stung with tears, "You- you didn't mess anything up, _I promise_ , it was all-"

_"Don't say that!"_

He was stunned to silence by the vicious outburst. Steely blue eyes met regretful green ones in a stare that seemed to last a decade, though in reality it lasted hardly a minute. All at once, any hostility that had been present in the alchemist melted away, only to be replaced with heartbreak and despair.

"I love you, Hugo," he sobbed, stepping slightly closer, "Why- what did I do _wrong?_ " His nails dug painfully into the flesh of his palms. He sounded almost hateful again, but the blonde couldn't help but feel like it wasn't directed towards him, even though it should be.

"Nothing!" Hugo felt his heart seize up, no longer able to hold back the flood of tears that had been steadily building, " _Nothing!_ This was all me, everything went wrong because of me! I-I had been planning to turn on you guys all along, ever since I stole the first token-"

"So it was a lie from the beginning?" he practically whispered, his lip quivering slightly, "Was _none_ of it real?"

"Of course it was real," he didn't even hesitate, " _It still is_ , it's more real than anything I've ever felt before."

"But how do you know?!"

"Because it's different! It's different than anything I've ever felt before, it's better! There hasn't been a lot of um... positivity in my life before you, Varian, maybe- maybe none at all. But when I look at you, I never wanna look away. I could listen to you talk for hours and hours and not get bored. And your laugh, i-it's like music! Your smile always manages to leave me breathless and- and right now you're _not_ smiling and I can't stand that it's because of _me_... It's all- all my fault." 

He paused, taking a shuddering breath before he managed to croak out another sentence, "I don't think I can ever forgive myself for that, let alone ask for _you_ to forgive me."

That... that seemed to strike a chord with Varian. He knew a thing or two about asking for forgiveness. Especially when you didn't deserve it. Whether Hugo did or not was still up in the air, as far as he was concerned. God, feelings were _so hard_.

He slowly approached the bars once more as Hugo jiggled the key into the lock, barely managing to click it into place with his trembling hands. The door swung open and they stared at each other for a moment, both too uncertain to make the first move.

"I..." Hugo trailed off, not knowing quite what to say. " _I love you too_." he breathed the words out, barely even whispered them, but they seemed to echo throughout the silent jail cell. It hung in the air, intensifying the already thick tension between them. The anxiety could be heard in both of their labored breathing.

Hardly a moment later, Varian practically threw himself into his arms, hanging onto him as if his life depended on it and sending them both tumbling to the ground. Hugo snapped out of his shock and returned the embrace with almost as much vigor, pulling him into his lap. He held the freckled boy as they both bawled in each other's arms.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Hugo, _oh god_ , I'm so sorry," The apologies went on and on, hardly intelligible through all the tears and snot. The guilt he felt for his anger was practically crushing. How dare he be mad at Hugo when he was once just as bad, if not worse, than him?

But Hugo wasn't having it. He placed his hands on Varian's cheeks and tilted his face towards his own, "No, Varian, please don't apologize, please. I-I hurt you and I'll never do it again. I'll make you smile and laugh and I'll never hurt you again, ok? Never." he searched the other's eyes, wondering if there was anything else he could say that might make the other believe him.

But he didn't have to say anything else. Varian nodded and sniffled and held on tighter, if that was even possible. A small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth and that was all Hugo needed.

"Can I kiss you?" He asked.

"Please," He answered, the smile stretching slightly further. He swooped down and captured his lips in a sweet, chaste kiss. It ended far too quickly for his liking, and he clumsily took to kissing ever freckle that graced his cheeks.

Varian let out a surprised wet laugh and closed his eyes, sliding his hands up to Hugo's shoulders, who relished in the sound which he had earlier compared to music. When he was certain he had kissed every inch of his face, he rested his forehead against the other's and closed his eyes as well.

"But... what about Donella?" Varian hesitantly opened his eyes, "What's she gonna do when she find out?"

"I..." He kept his eyes closed, reflecting on the relationship he once had with his mentor, the woman who practically raised him. He had learned everything he knew from her, but at this point he wasn't sure if that was a good thing. After all, he was a bad person, and he had learned from the best of the bad. 

He was equipped with countless manipulation tactics, all of which he had learned through experiencing them. His talk was smooth and his hands were quick. He always managed to get what he wanted. But while faking all these emotions, he never got a chance to actually feel them till now. In fact, he was told not to feel them. He was told they were a weakness. 

But then he saw Varian, who should have been the weakest of all by that logic. But he wasn't. He was strong, stronger than Hugo had ever been. He was kind too. He was kind and affectionate and generous. He used to think that he was an anomaly, that it was strange that he was strong as well as emotional. He now realized that he was not strong _despite_ his kindness, he was strong _because_ of it.

He wondered if Donella ever felt kindness. He wondered if she ever felt the attachment that she was so adamant against. Surely, if she had, she would not be against it, right? Then it would be foolish to think she would be attached to him in any way, not in the way he was attached to her. She would be mad when she found out, she would be disappointed. She would punish him. She would...

Well, it didn't matter what she would do. He didn't have to listen to her anymore. He didn't want to listen to her. He was grateful for everything she had done for him, but he didn't owe her anything. She had chosen to take him in, to feed him, to raise him. But when she took him in, she hadn't seen an orphaned child in need, she saw a business investment. She saw someone she could mold into the perfect criminal.

Somewhere along the line, though, she had failed to completely numb his heart. Maybe that's because she knew she needed his loyalty. She was raising him to con people, to betray people. She needed to give him a reason not to betray her when he no longer needed her. It had almost worked, he still loved her. He loved Varian too, and unfortunately for her, he now knew for a fact that Varian loved him right back. He had made up his mind.

"I don't care," he stared into Varian's eyes and felt a strange sense of loss as well as liberation as he said the words, "I don't care what she does now. She won't keep us apart. I won't let her." Varian rubbed their noses together.

"But she's gonna try," he told him, and he already knew that.

Hugo pursed his lips and rose to his feet, pulling the other along with him. Varian was silent as he was led up the stairs and to a small temporary sleeping quarters. He recognized the backpack that had been lazily slung over the chair of a desk, knowing it was Hugo's. This must have been where he had been staying, or rather where he had been planning on staying.

The blond leaned over said desk and scrambled to find a loose piece of parchment and a quill pen. He hesitated only for a moment before scribbling away at the paper. Varian watched silently as he wrote, only slightly tempted to look over his shoulder to read what was being written. But he resisted, which wasn't that hard. He trusted Hugo, after all.

He straightened himself from the desk and folded up the paper, his hand lingering for a moment over where it sat.

"What is it?" Varian's curiosity got the better of him, as it very often did.

"A note for Donella," he answered plainly, grabbing the backpack and slinging it over his shoulder, acting unbothered, "A final goodbye."

Varian just nodded and took his hand in comfort, interlacing their fingers together. And so, walking shoulder to shoulder, they left to find the others, who they knew must be out of their minds with worry.

Neither of them looked back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just one more chapter after this, I'm gonna go sleep now bye


	3. Sentiment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter y'all. I hope you're excited!! It do be kinda short tho-

When Donella returned to check on Hugo three days later, she was greeted with a dark room. It was empty of everything but the bare essentials that she had put there. The fireplace hadn't been touched, neither had the new candles that had been placed on the bedside table and the desk. It even seemed as if the chair hadn't moved an inch. One thing that did seem out of place, however, was a piece of paper sitting at the edge of the desk. She slowly approached it, her eyes narrowing with suspicion. As she picked it up, the sound of the paper sliding across the hard wood was the only sound in the otherwise silent room. Not even her breathing could be heard, it was practically second nature for an accomplished thief such as herself, and the cold room had her on edge.

Her eyes scanned the paper, rapidly absorbing the contents before her brain was given the chance to process. When her mind finally caught up to her racing thoughts, her eyes came to a halt and backed up, rereading the lines that had been hastily sprawled across the parchment. It read as follows:

> _~~Dear~~ Donella, I've freed Varian and we're leaving together. ~~We gone to find Nuru and~~ I won't tell you where we're going. Don't bother coming after us, you won't catch up. And even if you do, which you won't, I know every trick in your book. You taught them all to me. _
> 
> _I love Varian. I love Varian so much, I would die for him. He loves me back. I know because he told me so ~~and I cried~~ We're in love so I ~~can't~~ won't leave him. You said love makes people weak, but it doesn't. In fact, I think I am the strongest I've ever been. I hope you ~~don't hate~~ aren't too mad at me. I hope someday you could learn love ~~me~~ someone too. _
> 
> _Signed, Hugo P.S. I don't ever plan to see you again, so this is goodbye._

She crushed the paper in her hands, shaking with fury. Childish, was her first thought. The handwriting was sloppy, the wording rushed and jumbled, some parts scratched out entirely. _How dare he?_

Her anger was calm, quiet, calculated. She unfurled the crumpled letter and scanned it again, reading it over and over, squinting at the sentences he had tried to get rid of. He hadn't done a very good job. She knew they were going to find the other two children they had been traveling with, in fact, she had no doubt that they already had. 

There was no question of where the four were headed to. The eternal library was always their end goal, that couldn't have changed. How optimistic of Hugo to think she wouldn't follow. How naive. She recognized the language he used in the second half of the letter. It must have an attempt at emotional manipulation, and definitely not the worst one she'd seen. It was meant to guilt her into not following after them.

She had trained these trivial emotions out of the boy. She was confident in her work, always had been. But apprehension crept up her spine in spite of this. A small voice whispered doubts into her ear.

_Why would Hugo let Varian go in the first place, if not out of sincerity? Why would Varian be so quick to trust him again? Could there be some strategy to this that Hugo thought she would understand? He must have known she would never actually fall for something like this, right? What if this was actually how Hugo felt? What if Hugo was being serious?_

_What if she never saw Hugo again?_

Her breath caught in her throat. That last thought was... unexpected. But it made perfect sense. Hugo was her best thief. She would take a financial hit from him being gone. It was only natural that she feel distressed about it. But then, what was with that wording? 

"Never saw him again"? That was just so, for lack of a better word, sentimental. She was not a sentimental person. Why would this be an exception?

But her gut clenched at the thought of Hugo just being gone. He was a foolish boy, _betraying_ her like that. _And for Varian! Of all the people in the world, he chose the son of_ _-_

She stopped that train of thought in its tracks. She could unpack all of that another time. Hugo was still an idiot for going against her wishes. He knew better than that, and she knew better than him. She was doing it for his own good. There were things that he couldn't understand. She knew what she had to do now and she couldn't let _pesky sentiment_ get in the way Like she has all those years ago..

She let the letter drop to the dusty floor, crushing it under her foot on her way out of the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was interesting to write character like Donella in such depth, it was actually kinda hard. Leave kudos and a comment if you liked it, also leave a comment if you _didn't_ like it and tell me what you think I could do better.   
> Update 2/2/21: I've finally went through this whole work and editted it lmao. I've took out some stuff, put in some stuff, fixed a LOT of typos. Thanks for reading!


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